I need to get something off my chest. It’s been hanging out for like 15 years and I’m ready to do this.
I should preface with the fact that I had wicked PMS all week long, which sucked ass for Luanne.
I scolded her for doing the laundry wrong and then ten minutes later I got mad at her for doing the dishes wrong. I couldn’t just shut the hell up and be grateful that she was doing my laundry and my dishes. Oh no, I had to slip into my bright yellow and black bitch suit, fasten it up tight and make a big deal out of the fact that she doesn’t do laundry or dishes, exactly like I do them.
I think at one point I told her that it was totally obvious that she grew up with maids and she should stick to being spoiled, because she does spoiled way better than she does laundry and dishes. Ouch. Bad Molly.
So earlier this week, apart from me being shitty to my girlfriend, someone really got my goat (a totally underused term in my book, by the way). Now, my goat getter was likely a PMS casualty, I’ll cop to that. But she was also a catalyst for an overarching topic in which I would like to explore with you. And for that, I thank her.
Here’s how the goat getter-y started.
Last Sunday I shared a link on our Facebook page for the best vegan Mac & Cheese recipe in the whole universe. My Mac recipe is accompanied with a quick explanation about the difference between a vegan diet and a plant-based diet.
As soon as I shared the link, someone chimed in:
“Vegans are the for the animals and plant-based eaters aren’t”
This comment is the perfect example of a mindset that bugs the shit out of me. (this is a link to the image from our Facebook Page)
This would be the mindset belonging to staunch, preachy, holier than thou, judgmental vegans.
This type of vegan typically only hangs out with other judgmental vegans (can we just call them Jegans?), and the only conversations they have are about animals or veganism, which, let’s face it, to them, are mutually exclusive.
Vegans like this think that people don’t like them because they’re vegan, but they’re wrong.
People don’t like them because they make anyone who isn’t 100% vegan feel like they just ripped Bambi’s heart out with their bare fucking hands.
Here’s what I want the “Jegans” of the world to piece together.
They make veganism look more like an ugly hateful cult then an uplifting and rewarding, lifestyle, and this scares people off.
It scares people off who actually have an interest in eating less meat and animal products. Which in turn would save some animals. And isn’t this the whole point for staunch vegans? To save animals? (It’s a good thing vegans are looking out for the animals, because as was pointed out, plant-based eaters don’t give a shit about Bambi)
This is what I would like to say to the preachy, judgmental vegans of the world:
You’re doing more harm than good with your unfriendly, preachy, judgmental, totally unapproachable approach. I lovingly urge you to get over yourself, stop judging, and focus on being the change you want to see in the world without shutting the world out with your attitude.
I guarantee that this strategy will save more animals in the long run.
I get where the passion comes from, I do. Animals are awesome, innocent creatures, and in a perfect world everyone would eat a plant-based diet, saving billions of dollars in healthcare, putting a halt to the obesity epidemic, mending our environmental catastrophes and saving animal and human lives everywhere.
But we live in a world where eating animals has been richly steeped into who we are. It takes time for people to undo a lifetime of programming and conditioning.
And the last thing that people need when they’re trying to make improvements in their life, is someone telling them that they’re not doing good enough.
So to the people of the world who aren’t totally vegan or plant-based, but taking strides to incorporate more plant foods into the diet and less of everything, bless you. Keep up the awesome work and never let anyone make you feel bad about where you’re at in your process.
If you’re not 100% vegan you might not get love from all vegans, but from me, you can expect lots of love, never ending support and encouragement, high fives, and plenty of booty bumps.
Keep doing your best, and remember that your best today will be different from your best tomorrow. And if your best today looks like a block of cheese, accompanied by a ham sandwich, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.
As a lifetime vegetarian, a vegan of 7 years and a mainly plant-based eater for 2 years, I would like to apologize on behalf of judgmental vegans everywhere. I hope that one day we can all play on the playground together.
And If you don’t hear from me next week, the vegan police have me locked up somewhere, forcing me watch Earthlings over and over again, only giving me breaks to play with baby piglets and newborn goats.
Over and out – I have to go back to my cave, Smeagol style.
Today’s recipe is insanely easy. I should know, 10 minutes for lunch is about what I’m averaging right now. You can whip this sucker together in 7 minutes, tops.
Cucumber Pasta with hummus, kalamata olives, cherry tomatoes and fresh basil
1 large English Cucumber
Hummus (maybe from last week’s hummus recipe?)
Kalamata olives, pitted and cut in half
Grape tomatoes, quartered
Fresh basil, minced
- Use a spiralizer to make the cucumber pasta and place in a bowl or on a plate.
- Top with hummus, olives, tomatoes, basil and walnuts.
I didn’t add measurements to the ingredients because you can add however much you like of each. Seriously, you can’t screw this up. One English cucumber will make two medium sized portions.
I hope you have a happy week. May it be filled with support, love and encouragement.
If you have friends, family or co-workers who have been annoyed with vegans in the past, will you do me a solid and share this post with them?