There’s No Magic in Perfect + Quick & Easy Hummus From Canned Beans

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You know that voice in your head?

The one that constantly tells you that you aren’t good enough.

The one that’s quick to remind you that you could be doing SO much better.

The one that insists that even when you do your best, it still doesn’t cut it.

The voice that clearly thinks you’re shit, regardless of how much progress you’ve made and everything you’ve overcome to get to where you are.

You know the voice.

It’s always there, a harsh, judgmental, unsupportive critic.

It keeps you stuck. It makes you sad. It takes away your power.

It makes you doubt yourself.

Well, you know what my love? You don’t need it and you don’t deserve it.

But apparently, it never got the fucking memo that NO ONE is perfect and that you are RIGHT where you’re supposed to be on your journey of life. So let’s deliver that memo.

Getting your shit together and having goals is awesome, especially when those goals are going to help you live a longer, healthier and happier life. But there’s no rule that says the path to reaching those goals has to be an uphill battle in a hot, sticky jungle while wearing a puffy down bodysuit and 6-inch stilettos with Ace of Base blasting in the background.

It does NOT have to suck.

The path to reaching your goals can be happy. Peaceful. Uncomplicated. It can be a day at the fucking spa.

And the beauty is, you get to choose.

You can choose miserable, hard and discouraging.

Or you can choose serene, easy and supported.

If you want the easier path, you gotta stop taking those judgmental voices in your head seriously and commit to being totally okay with wherever you’re at on your path, for better or for worse.

Let’s say that one of your goals is to eat a Whole Food Plant Based diet five days a week. Awesome.

You ate like a plant based boss on Monday. Tuesday you nailed it. Wednesday was a blur of veggies, beans and grains. But Thursday…oh Thursday….

It starts out with a bang. You have your green smoothie in the morning and when you get hungry again you eat a big bowl of steel cut oats and almond butter toast. So far so good. Lunch is meal plan leftovers – excellent. Yummy and satisfying. Doing good!

But as soon as 3pm rolls around, your co-worker comes over and plops down a jelly-filled donut on your desk. Oh for fuck’s sake you think to yourself as the bright red jelly oozes out of the donut, like it’s ready and waiting for you. Your co-worker smiles as she bites into her donut, making mmmm sounds and closing her eyes with pleasure.

Damn it. Why is the combination of sugar, fat, and bread so fucking magical?

You think about the apple that you brought from home, it’s all washed and ready to go. It’s in your bag, not even a foot away. You look at the donut. You look at your bag. You look at your co-worker who is currently climaxing with donut delight.

Fuck it. You grab the donut, you put it in your mouth and you bite. You don’t take a dainty “ladylike” bite either. You bite into that fucker like it is actually Christian Grey. You close your eyes. You feel the rush of sugar hit you. And for one full minute, you are in total bliss, and the thought of your apple has disappeared completely from your mind.

Seeking plant based imperfectionists

No credit card or perfection required.

You and your co-worker look at each other as you both lick your fingers and wipe sticky red jelly from the corners of your mouths. As she leaves to go back to her desk, it hits you: this wasn’t a friendly visit to say hi and talk about your new boss. It was an invitation to have an orgy, right there at your desk.

And you accepted.

Here it comes. The voice in your head starts up:

Why the fuck did you do that? You were doing SO well and you messed it all up. I told you that you’d never be able to last 5 days. You may as well pick up a pizza and some ice cream on your way home to punish yourself for inhaling that donut. You will NEVER reach your goal, you loser.

This is the fork in the road.

This is where you get to choose.

Do you want a happy spa, or do you want Ace of Base, jungle, or stilettos?

Either one is an option, even after you ate the donut. Yup, eating the donut doesn’t cause the mind drama; it’s what you think about eating the donut that causes the mind drama.

If you want the hard, shitty, Ace of Base path, here’s what your next move would look like:

You turn to that voice, and you say:

You’re right; I SUCK!!! Why did I do that? If I can’t be perfect, why do I even try? My goal is totally unrealistic, I’m never going to get there. I suck. I suck. I suck. Good idea on the pizza and ice cream; there’s no point in eating healthy the rest of the day or week for that matter. I guess I’m just not cut out to eat plant based.

RESULT: Eating greasy pizza and ice cream for dinner. Going to bed feeling shitty and guilty. Waking up unmotivated to eat well and feeling disconnected and far away from your goal.

Okay, tiger, let’s rewind this track to right after you ate the donut.

If you want the happy spa path, here’s what your next move would look like after that crappy, judgmental voice starts up:

You turn to that voice and you say:

Thanks, brain, but you need to fuck off, and I say that with SO MUCH love. I will reach my goal, but I need you to simmer down because you’re making it harder for me than necessary. So I had a donut; it’s not the end of the world. And it’s definitely not worth eating crappy pizza and ice cream over, especially when I have delicious, healthy food in my fridge waiting for me. I’m in charge, not you.

RESULT: Having a super nutrient-dense dinner, going to bed feeling empowered and proud of yourself for eating a healthy dinner after you ate a donut for a snack earlier in the day. Waking up refreshed and excited to make your green smoothie and knowing that you can reach your goal with ease and grace.

You get to choose.

Magic doesn’t happen by being perfect. Being perfect is overrated and unrealistic. Magic happens when you embrace your imperfections and lovingly move on.

You have more power than you realize, and you’re more than capable of reaching every single goal that you set for yourself.

The question is, will you be sweating balls, scaling a steep-ass hill in stilettos, and blasting Ace of Base?

Or will I find your ass being pampered at the spa?

Today’s hummus from canned beans recipe is ridiculously easy and fast

Perfect Hummus From Canned Beans

Author: Molly Patrick

Ingredients

  • 1 can organic garbanzo beans if you already have cooked garbanzos in your fridge that you need to use up, one can of beans is equivalent to about 1 1/2 cups / 260g, drained and rinsed well
  • 1 garlic clove peeled left whole
  • 2 tablespoons lemon juice
  • ¼ cup tahini 60g
  • ¼ cup water 60ml
  • ½ teaspoon sea salt

Instructions

  • Place all of the ingredients into your food processor and process until super creamy and smooth.
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Our Sweary Saturday Love Letters are written by our ex-boozer, ex-smoker, plant-loving co-founder, Molly Patrick.

22 Comments

  1. Alex on January 16, 2017 at 2:52 am

    Yay hummus!
    I usually just guess and make it up when I go along whenever I fancy whipping some up. Sometimes it looks like the above dip of gloriousness-ness, other times.. not so much. Think I’ll be checking back here next time!

    P.S. just stumbled across your blog and rather enjoying it.

    • Clean Food Dirty Girl on January 16, 2017 at 5:39 am

      Hi Alex, glad that you’re digging the blog. If you haven’t already, join us in Molly’s private Facebook group to keep the conversation going. 😉

      xo
      Meghann
      Team Dirty Girl

      • Alex on January 16, 2017 at 6:12 am

        Joined! Well pending acceptance.. finger’s crossed!
        Thanks for the heads up

  2. Amanda on September 4, 2017 at 4:07 am

    Would this work in a blender?

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on September 5, 2017 at 6:49 am

      Hi Amanda, high powered blenders, like Vitamix, Blendtec and even Ninja should all handle this recipe with ease. I would think a traditional drink type blender with a lower power motor might have a harder time blending a hummus.

      Karen
      Team Dirty Girl

      • Amanda on September 5, 2017 at 3:40 pm

        Thank you!

  3. Terri on January 3, 2018 at 4:18 pm

    5 stars
    I just whipped this – so yummy: I added some cayenne for kick- another keeper, thank you

  4. Kaywhycee on January 8, 2018 at 10:19 am

    4 stars
    Hi, enjoying your blog… I’d recommend adding extra virgin olive oil for the final element!

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on January 8, 2018 at 3:28 pm

      Hi Kaywhycee, Thanks for stopping by. As our meal plans are whole food plant based we are advocates for no added oils but if you like it, by all means, enjoy.

      Karen
      Team Dirty Girl

  5. Donna on January 10, 2018 at 10:36 am

    Can you provide calorie count?

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on January 10, 2018 at 4:10 pm

      Hi Donna, Molly has written about why we don’t provide calorie counts for our recipes, but because our recipes are whole food plant based it’s relatively easy to figure out the information. You’ll want to use one of the freely available nutrient trackers (Cronometer is one that comes to mind) to see the estimated macro / micro nutrient amounts for a particular recipe.

      Karen
      Team Dirty Girl

  6. Karen on October 15, 2018 at 5:48 pm

    This is delicious. Very creamy and you don’t miss oil in it.

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on October 16, 2018 at 5:24 am

      Hi Karen, Thanks for sharing that you enjoyed the hummus recipe! ~Karen

  7. Heidi on May 30, 2019 at 4:49 am

    I used the aquafaba from the can instead of the water and cut the salt by half, with amazing results! I’m thrilled to have a good basic recipe that isn’t loaded with oil! Instead, it’s extra nourishing as well as delicious!

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on May 30, 2019 at 4:59 am

      Thanks for sharing, Heidi! The aquafaba has water-soluble nutrients so you are getting more good stuff. ~Karen

  8. Lay on December 9, 2019 at 7:16 pm

    5 stars
    Seriously, this is SO easy and DELICIOUS! Thank you for sharing this simple and flavorful recipe!

    • Molly Patrick on December 9, 2019 at 8:53 pm

      Right??
      I make it all the time. It’s surprisingly tasty.
      So glad you like it!
      xo
      Molly

  9. Diane M on March 26, 2020 at 9:41 am

    Thank you for this easy recipe! If we want to complicate things and use dried beans, how would the recipe change? You can post a link here if you have that already! Thanks!

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl on March 26, 2020 at 10:24 am

      Hi Diane! Home-cooked beans are so wonderful and will work well in this recipe. Molly has a recipe for preparing dried garbanzos over here. ~Karen

  10. DIANE MILLE on March 26, 2020 at 11:11 am

    Thank you!

  11. Mark C on July 23, 2021 at 5:18 pm

    This is the simplest recipe ever for perfect hummus. I use it as is or add roasted veggies or almonds and most times hot peppers. I love that there is no oil added. BTW, love this site.

    • Team Clean Food Dirty Girl - Steph on July 25, 2021 at 9:29 am

      Hey, Mark! We definitely agree and we dig that you really make it your own!

      Thanks for the love,
      Stephanie

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